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Noises in the Night

6/9/2020

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Are you like me?   And d'you get scared when you hear strange noises in the night??   Are you afraid of ghosts???   D'you even believe in ghosts???? Oooooh!   What was that bump?   What was that screech??    Who - or what - sighed that sigh??? 

The first thing you do is pull your bedcovers right up, so that only your
eyes are visible...and your eyes are open really wide, flitting from side to side trying to peer into the darkness!   The second thing you do, is hold your breath, as though if you stop breathing, no ghost will hear you!!   And the third thing you do is pull your knees up tight and close your eyes again, and your imagination takes over!!!   White spectres flit around your bedroom, weaving shapes over your quilt, and making scary moaning noises!! Oooooooh!   And then, more Ooooooooh!!

What should you do?   Scamper through to where you have left your telephone and dial 999?   Will the Police believe you??   Will they think you are literally "off your head"???    When they answer your call, asking whether you want Fire, Police or Ambulance, what should you answer?   One, or two,or all three????   Your heart races bump-ity, bump-ity, bump!  Your pulse races too, like your heart!!   Your breath comes in short sharp gasps!!! Then common sense takes over......you cast your memory back to your evening meal - cauliflower with cheese sauce, and heavy on the cheese, and it was late!   In fact, just before you went off to bed!!    So, no, you don't do any of the above.   In fact, you get up, pop the kettle on, make yourself a nice cup of tea, fill a hot water bottle, and go back to bed.......and promise yourself never again to have cheese with your evening meal before going to bed, so that no more will you hear Noises in the Night!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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